Twilight Grey Bi Dawn
We are tired of being analyzed, defined and represented by people other than ourselves, or worse yet, not considered at all. We are frustrated by the imposed isolation and invisibility that comes from being told or expected to choose either a homosexual or heterosexual identity.
Monosexuality is a heterosexist dictate used to oppress homosexuals and to negate the validity of bisexuality.
Bisexuality is a whole, fluid identity. Do not assume that bisexuality is binary or duogamous in nature: that we have “two” sides or that we must be involved simultaneously with both genders to be fulfilled human beings. In fact, don’t assume that there are only two genders. Do not mistake our fluidity for confusion, irresponsibility, or an inability to commit. Do not equate promiscuity, infidelity, or unsafe sexual behavior with bisexuality. Those are human traits that cross all sexual orientations. Nothing should be assumed about anyone’s sexuality, including your own.
We are angered by those who refuse to accept our existence; our issues; our contributions; our alliances; our voice. It is time for the bisexual voice to be heard.
”Common topics
Consider this the FAQ for this Tumblr. Most of the questions I get can be answered by reading the links below.
Definitions of bisexuality:
- What is bisexuality?
- More than one: Robyn Ochs’ definition
- What does it mean to be bisexual?
- Bisexuals defined
- Bisexual manifesto
- Symbolism of the bi pride flag
Etymology, early theories about bisexuality and misconceptions about “bi = two”:
- “Psychosexual hermaphrodites”
- Bisexuality: from plants to people
- “Being Bisexual Means That You’re Only Attracted to Two Genders. Bi Means Two. Two Genders.”
- One thing I am really tired of talking about
- “Language changes over time, it’s not static”
Comparing and contrasting bisexuality and pansexuality:
- Bisexual and pansexual and if there’s a difference (and part 2 and 3)
- Some differences and similarities between bisexuality and pansexuality
- “How would you explain the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality?”
- Can someone explain to me the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality in a non-aggressive way?
- “Care to explain?”
Identifying as bisexual vs. pansexual:
- Why I identify as bisexual and not pansexual
- RitchandFamous: Bisexual v. pansexual
- “I like ‘bisexual.’”
- “My identity is mine to define.”
- “Acknowledge and respect the way people identify.”
- You do not get to define my identity for me.
- “Please never tell other people what they can identify as.”
- “Please don’t take a giant dump on my identity.”
- How to correct people when they get your sexual orientation wrong
Bisexuality and accusations of binarism:
I found my definition of bisexuality posted on Tumblr and reposted. And reposted. And reposted. Very cool!
DEFINITION OF BISEXUALITY: I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted - romantically and/or sexually - to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree. ~ from “Selected Quotes” by Robyn Ochs
Robyn, your definition revolutionized my feelings about identifying as bisexual. I spent quite a long time feeling like I must be a terrible person because I was constantly seeing people on Tumblr talk about what a bigoted, binarist, generally awful thing being bisexual is and not knowing how to respond to it. One day I found this graphic and it changed everything.
So, thank you.
(via bisexual-community)
Here’s a quick guide on the many ways you can do it.
- Go to any number of bisexual websites that give helpful definitions and FAQs on bisexuality.
- Look on the internet to see what bisexual people have written about how they define their sexuality. It’s quite easy to do.
- Politely ask a bisexual person (if they’re agreeable to being asked) about their definitions of what the term means.
- Do some research into the historical context of the phrase and how it originated.
- Do all of the above.
Here’s a quick guide on the way NOT to do it.
- Look at the “bi”, assume the ‘two’ is referring to a male/female binary, and decide it means that bisexual people can only be attracted to two genders.
- Act like an authority from your few seconds worth of half-caring about what it might mean, and paint bisexual people as transphobic based on this conclusion.
Sadly, it seems like that latter is becoming more and more common, and people don’t seem to realise how biphobic it is.
